Your Dog Bit…When I tried to Rob You!

December 4, 2013, by Michael A. DeMayo

Some things really are just too good to make up.  This guy gets an A in my book for creativity and a D for character.  The D could possibly move to a C if the beard in his mug shot is for No Shave November in an effort to spread awareness for prostate cancer. 

Earlier this week, The Gaston Gazette covered a story about a man who broke into a home and blamed the dog for doing it.  Hahahahhahahah! You cannot make this up.  Jacob Gladden, a 38 year old from Denver, North Carolina was charged with attempted first degree burglary. 

Well, that’s right, first degree—attempted. The large dog barked and frightened the burglar—or we can call him the “defendant.”  This lady was in her house when she says, according to the news story, she heard glass breaking and subsequent barking. The paper did an incredible job covering the story and has provided us all with happy hour small talk.  Hopefully, the 50k bond won’t hinder a quick release.  After all it’s a dog eat dog world in jail.  Haha—sorry.  Hopefully his wife will believe his story that he was cutting across the lady’s yard or he’ll end up in the doghou…I’m sorry…I just can’t.  Hahahahahahahahaha.

Oh last thing—his possible defense to officers “Just passin’ through officer—just a trivial trespass” had a better shot of working until he “spilled the beans to the officer” who wrote the report.  I can vision it now.  As he stands in the lady’s backyard and his shoeprints in the garage, he raises his hands in the air in a Beauty and the Beast way and says, “Be my guest!” when the officers request information and an opportunity to collect evidence. That is dog gone good detective work.  That’s all folks.

 
 

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